I 'dis a Spammer

I decided to strike back at a spammer from Hong Kong.

At 08:21 AM 7/22/97 +0800, you wrote:
>Attention: Kremer, Steve
>   Re.:  The "momentum MEDIA" banner network
>Please excuse the intrusion.  This message is intended for
>webmasters, owners and managers of "serious" and "respectable"
>websites.  Our research indicates that this includes you.
>The "momentum MEDIA" banner network is designed to help thousands
>of website owners earn a regular monthly sponsorship income.
>     "momentum MEDIA"
>Hope you find it interesting.
>    Regards,
>     Anthony L Tobin

Hi Anthony,

Boy, did your research get my site wrong.  My site is anything but "serious" and "respectable".  I try my best to be "humorous" and "insulting".

But, like any good capitalist I would like to make money so, I did go to your site and check out your banner offer.  I only have one question:  Now that Hong Kong is be run by the Chinese Communists will you be paying your 2.5 cents per hit in US dollars or the Chinese Yuan?   Or better yet you could pay me with those little paper parasols that you find in fancy fruity mixed drinks.  As a child my first memories of the words "Hong Kong" was seeing the name on a label on the little paper umbrellas.  My father had taken the family out to a fancy restaurant to celebrate my mother's birthday. My mother ordered a "Mai Tai" and when her drink arrived it had the little umbrella.  My mother gave it to my brother.  I got to keep the little plastic sword toothpick that was stabbed thru the olive in my dad's martini.  Later, in the car on the way home, I got to have the umbrella after threatening my brother with the sword.  I told him I would cut off his nose and feed it to our dog.  Boy, four year old little brothers will believe anything.

So I have always loved those little paper umbrellas.   I try to get them whenever I go to a bar.  You can well imagine the strange looks I get when I order a beer and say "...and can you put one of those little paper umbrellas in it?"  So if you want to pay me in US dollars or paper umbrellas that would be just fine.

Steven M. Kremer
(aka Kremer, Steve)

Click Here to recommend this letter to your friends

More Fun Letters....

A lost e-mail from the Big Apple

ABC: Does it stand for "Annoying Broadcast Cheapskates"?

"Pick-A-Dick", and we don't mean Richard

Re: I Believe You guys are garbage

I do love Spiders

Spams, correct spelling optional

Letter From A Netscape Lawyer 

Letter from a United Parcel Service Attorney

James Spader, Darth Vader, Ralph Nader. Which of these three doesn't own a computer?

I 'dis a Spammer

A Letter From Jim 

I get nasty with "Big Brother" 

E-Mail From "Muppets Treasure Island" 

Sleepy In Singapore 

MSNBC, does it stand for: MacintoSh & Netscape are Better for Cruising? 

"Dominant Keith" from J Crew doesn't like our humor

Which has four legs, a Table or a <Table></Table> ?

The Top Ten names for the new Fort Hays State University Web server

AOL Dating and Denmark


bottom include

Welcome to Who needs boring geometric patterns on their desktop.  Click here for funny wallpaper!
Change your computer's Start Up Screen
Funny Stories for you to read

What's New at JokeWallpaper.comUpdated Sun. March 10, 2002
"Osama bin Laden Urnial Mat"

Assorted Nuts - Humor That Defies CategorizationStrange and Funny Links We've FoundLetters - Fun e-mail from lawyers and other folks
Funny graphics to link to our site Articles about us Our Frequently Asked Questions

Feel free to download any graphic on this site to use on your personal computer.   But please do not copy on to disk, redistribute, attach e-mail, or post the graphics or text on any Web page, FTP site, news group, Intranet or mailing list.   We welcome links to this site but please link only to the home page and do not link to individual graphic files.
All of the text and graphics on this Web site are Copyright 1995-2005 Steven M. Kremer.   All Rights Reserved.

Bookmark this page. Hold down your "Control" and "D" keys and it's done.

Send us an e-mail to  Ideas, suggestions, flames...we read 'em all!  If you are writing with a question check our F.A.Q. page first, it may have your answer.

Home Page: